There is now strong scientific evidence that proves that your negative emotions actually interfere with the rational parts of your brain. This means when you experience a fear, anxiety, upset or anger, you literally can’t access all the intelligence, resources and capabilities you have to deal with such emotions.
(Think about the last time you were angry with someone: were you tempted to say things that you would have regretted later?)
(Remember that Superman was faster than a speeding train, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound… except around kryptonite, which took all his powers away.)
And here’s what makes that phenomenon even worse: when a current event or situation triggers the memory of a past negative event you experienced, your brain ‘switches back’ to the original negative event, and you become equipped only with the mental and emotional resources you had when that original event occurred.
For example, let’s say that when you were 13 years old, you decided to tell a boy or girl that you liked them, and asked them out – and you were rejected and humiliated.
Now, 30 years later, you are in the middle of a sales conversation with a potential client. Somehow your prospective client uses a phrase that jars your subconscious into remembering that humiliating rejection you experienced when you were 13.
The confidence you had coming into the conversation disappears, and you suddenly feel the same emotions you experienced all those years ago, even if you aren’t even aware of it why it’s happening. You just know you feel uncomfortable and rejected, even if it hasn’t happened yet.
The result? You react exactly as you would have when you were 13. You’re stripped of all the wisdom, knowledge and experience you have gained in the past 30 years, and what you do and say comes from the knowledge and experience you had at age 13.
I’m guessing you don’t want a 13-year-old running your sales conversations.
You:
Don’t even ask the person to work with you, but end the conversation early, saying ‘I just knew they were going to say no.’
Discount your rates out of fear, and to overcome the feeling of rejection.
Say or do something that is out of character, or feels ‘stupid’ later, because it was something your 13-year-old self would have said or done.
If you’ve been feeling ineffective in sales conversations, that’s just one example of the way that your business kryptonite can strike.
No matter how much personal growth work you’ve done, unless you’ve gotten rid of the business kryptonite, you’re missing out on your success.
There is a common misconception out there that it is easy to talk yourself through overcoming these types of issues, through the use of sheer willpower.
Have you ever heard:
“Just get comfortable with being uncomfortable”
or
“You have to do whatever it takes to build your business” (including sacrificing your health, your family, and your happiness!)
So you may try to push through, relying on willpower to do what you need to do.
If you’re solely depending on will power, you are putting out 110% of the effort to receive only 10% of the results. |
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