William Doherty, Terry Real, Tammy Nelson, and more! – The Dilemmas of Divorce – NAFHCOTB
No cases involve more momentous consequences than those involving couples on the brink of divorce, especially when children are involved. No matter how neutral we try to be, our beliefs, judgments, and behavior in the therapy room can have enormous repercussions on whether clients decide to go all-in for saving their marriage or dissolve it. What’s our responsibility and what role should our own values and judgments play in the process? Is therapeutic neutrality really possible when marriages are on the line? Should it be?
To help you answer these questions, we’re launching an all-new online video course — The Dilemmas of Divorce: New Approaches for Helping Couples on the Brink. It features William Doherty, Terry Real, Tammy Nelson, Michele Weiner-Davis, Patricia Papernow, and Elana Katz — leading innovators in the field of couples therapy who will share new approaches they’ve developed specifically for couples considering divorce.
You’ll learn how to determine the best interests of your clients and their entire families and get the practical guidance you need to start using these new approaches with couples considering divorce in your own practice.
- Explore practical approaches to help ambivalent partners move forward with clarity and confidence
- Find out how to guide a divorcing couple through a 3-stage process that allows them to end their union with respect and good will
- Discover the limits of therapeutic neutrality with couples considering divorce and learn how to actively engage with both partners in therapy
- Gain new skills, new understanding, and new levels of confidence as you work with challenging couples considering divorce
Take the first step to enhancing your skills and increasing your effectiveness by signing up now for this online course.
Master the Approaches these Experts Rely On
To Stay or Go: An Introduction to Discernment Counseling
Explore an innovative approach for helping ambivalent couples (in which only one partner is a real “customer” for therapy) clarify their decision about whether or not to stay together. You’ll learn:
- The common mistakes therapists make with “mixed agenda” couples
- How to use individual and conjoint sessions to help both partners take responsibility for their contributions to the problems in the relationship
- How to help them reflect on the consequences of ending their commitment to each other and the impact it may have on their family
- How to prepare them to deal with the next stage in their lives, whether they divorce or not, with a fuller awareness
William Doherty is a professor and director of the Minnesota Couples on the Brink Project at the University of Minnesota. His books include Take Back Your Marriage.
When Is Enough Enough?
Investigate how to know when it’s time to help couples dissolve their marriage versus throwing your weight behind one last try to make things work. We’ll focus on:
- Challenging the myth of therapeutic neutrality
- The clarifying questions to ask ourselves when we’re ambivalent about pushing the relationship on or helping the couple pull the plug
- When and how therapists should offer couples direct feedback about staying together or not
- How to help a couple say goodbye to each other when that’s the appropriate course for them
Terry Real founded the Relational Life Institute and is Good Morning, America’s relationship expert. His books include The New Rules of Marriage: What You Need to Make Love Work.
The Intentional Divorce
Learn a three-stage process for helping couples end their union in a spirit of cooperation and good will. You’ll get an overview of the:
- Crisis Phase – Learn strategies for guiding couples through the decision process, handling emotional issues, addressing the practical questions of how to negotiate the legal system, developing a co-parenting plan, and working through other day-to-day details
- Insight Phase – Help divorcing couples review the deeper meaning of their marriage, determine what they’ve learned, find ways to mourn their loss, and express regrets and appreciation to each other
- Vision Phase – Support the couple in finding ways — often through ritual — to honor the marriage and approach divorce as an important life passage rather than a shameful failure
Tammy Nelson is a board-certified sexologist, a certified Imago therapist, a licensed professional counselor, and the author of Getting the Sex You Want and The New Monogamy.
Divorce Busting
Learn practical strategies to bring together polarized couples on the brink of divorce, especially when children are involved. We’ll focus on:
- How to reframe, persuade, and structure therapy in ways that enhance the likelihood of reconciliation
- The specific language choices that can either create optimism or pessimism with ambivalent couples
- Teaching motivated partners how to develop a step-by-step plan for saving their marriage
- How to help motivated clients wishing to maintain a marriage focus on themselves, rebuild strengths, and keep their desperation at bay
Michele Weiner-Davis is the director of the Divorce Busting Center in Colorado and author of several bestselling books, including The Sex-Starved Marriage and Divorce Busting.
Uncoupling and Recoupling After 50
Take a look at the recent increase in “gray divorce” and strategies for helping boomer clients handle the challenges of remarriage. We’ll explore:
- The common dynamics and dilemmas of gray divorce
- Common mistakes therapists make in working with boomer stepparents and their adult stepchildren
- Best practices for handling the often combustible triangle of biological parent, adult stepchild, and newly married stepparent
- How to help alienated boomer fathers and their daughters develop emotional connection in the wake of a divorce
Patricia Papernow has worked as a trainer, consultant, and therapist with stepfamily relationships for more than 30 years. She’s the author of the award-winning book Becoming a Stepfamily and Surviving and Thriving in Stepfamily Relationships.
Collaborative Divorce Coaching
Examine the role therapists can play in a non-adversarial alternative to traditional divorce. We’ll look at:
- How therapists, attorneys, and financial professionals can work together as a team to maximize the outcome for all parties involves in a divorce
- The training required to become a collaborative divorce coach
- The stages of the collaborative divorce process and which couples it is most appropriate for
- Concrete strategies for encouraging constructive dialogue at the divorce settlement table
Elana Katz is an EFT trainer and a senior faculty member at the Ackerman Institute for the Family, where she teaches advanced family therapy and directs the Family and Divorce Mediation Program.
- Find new approaches that address the increasingly nuanced range of issues couples face?
- Help divorcing couples negotiate thorny issues like custody of children, and financial and property distributions?
- Assess your own values and beliefs when dealing with a couple’s desire to divorce?
- Help divorcing couples navigate a sexual re-kindling during the separation period?
- Incorporate coaching skills into your couples practice. Help newly remarried partners navigate the unique obligations and challenges that come with a second marriage and step-relations?
- Balance the needs of individual and couples therapy sessions with struggling partners?
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